Witton Albion JFC

Witton Albion swept aside Frodsham Falcons in a feisty affair at the stadio de la Cheshire FA on Sunday, delivering a reminder to the rest of this wackier-than-the-Championship league that they are capable of more footballing comedy than most. As the ref jogged up right on kick-off time after his 3rd game of the day, he blew on his trusty Thunderer (other whistle brands are available) and it was game on.

After a few false calls it was the red-and-white-and-black-shorts-with-white-trim team in the lead when Sam H passed splendidly for Luke to smash home at the far post, then calamity struck as the Witton air-kicked the way to a Frodsham equaliser. At this stage, fans have seen Witton fold like wet loo-paper but there was a smidgeon of aggression up top as Nathan ignored all seemingly logical passes sliding the definitely logical pass to Dan who smashed the ball into the roof of the net from 1 yard out. Frodsham, following some bellowing from their manager Nigel, went on the attack but Theo, Harry and Tom A were equal to the fast Frodsham attack time and time again. Sam R and Tommy C produced excellent cover at full-back, but when this defence was breached the goal custodian Elliot produced two fantastic (one low – one high) saves to keep the Albs in front at half time.

A half time team talk comprising long silences and a “demonstration” of getting to the ball first from the manager surprisingly led to the home team actually producing the requested goods in the second half. Elliot J was truly sweeping all before him as Fin O, Elliot W and Jack were toiling away in midfield with little acclaim. However, it was their hard work in the middle that set up a stream of second half attacks as Fin H nabbed a tap in and after excellent skills and shielding from Keegan, a nicely struck second into the top corner. As the shots rained onto the Frodsham goal, it was left to Thomas to finish the scoring with a snappy volley after a great first touch – reward for a good couple of weeks in attacking midfield.

After the game, the managers left the shoutiness (shoutyness, shouty, shoutiatis, grrr … damn you spell check) aside, shook hands, agreed the banter was pretty good and honours were awarded to Frodsham courtesy of their 6-1 win a few weeks earlier. Crazy league indeed. Nonetheless, Witton looked good going forward and with a solid defence could look forward to the rest of the season with confidence.

Captain’s man of the match: Finn H
Managers man of the match: Elliot J
Quote of the day: “you’ve given us NOTHING ref!”
Magic moment: a lovely bouncing drop goal for the (disallowed) 6th goal from the manager.